There's so much going on in the world and honestly I don't know what I can do or even should do. I'm torn with emotions and thoughts about this whole war situation that I want to sympathies with Ukraine for being attacked but yet I cannot completely feel for them since I've seen and read stories about how they forces their own young people to participate in the war even when they just want to survive and live, run away from the quite certain death and pain. That's why I cannot fully support them if they throw out the freedom of choice out of the window. And no I do not sympathies with Russia's dictators choice or reasons for the war, but I do not blame the entire people of that country, because not all Russians wants this war. Not all of them knew nor support this. That's why I cannot support neither of them I can only express disgust and disappointment towards people who wants this, who participate in it, who approves of it. War is cruel, killing anyone good or bad doesn't make anyone better than the other. Wishing for or supporting war and death is the worst kind of being you can be to me. Dictatorship should only exist if they lead with their peoples best interest in mind. But unfortunately they don't. People are selfish and arrogant at times.
Right now I'm just feeling lost.
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So I have a few ideas and projects I want to do or are currently doing but most of time it is dormant since my interest is going roller coasters every day. But one thing I have thought about is that if you get a chance to try something you perhaps been interesting in but doesn't at the time want to spend money or space for it, if you get a chance to try it, Take That Damned Chance! Because you don't know when the next time you get the chance and if you don't take this chance you won't be able to find out whether you don't like it or if it is something you want to continue with. I have finally started to work with myself to feel and think less about (others) perfection and more about having fun and be happy with what you can get in the moment.
Now I have had my computer for about 2 years or more and I've started try out a little game play recording last year, but didn't go far since a lot of technical stuff didn't work the way I wanted and since you easily compare yourself with others ability to talk and contribute a good video aesthetic you lose your motivation to continue. So that is something important to work with: not looking or comparing yourself to others who have worked for a long time.
Be kind to yourself. |
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May 2024
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